Steve Goodier Inspirations

[Rhonda]

FOUR TRAITS OF EFFECTIVE LEADERS

A young officer in the Army discovered that he had no change when he
tried to buy a soft drink from a vending machine. He flagged down a
passing private and asked him, "Do you have change for a dollar?"

The private said cheerfully, "I think so. Let me take a look."

The officer drew himself up stiffly and said, "Soldier, that is no
way to address a superior. We'll start all over again. Do you have
change for a dollar?"

The private came to attention, saluted smartly, and said, "No, sir!"

Each of us commands some authority. There are or will be those we
guide, supervise, rear, mentor or lead. Some of us will be effective
and others will feel as if we're running a cemetery: we've got a lot
of people under us and nobody's listening.

Much has been written and taught about leadership, but I find that at
least four traits are common in all people of authority who
effectively elicit cooperation and respect from those who look up to
them. Whether you are a parent, whether you find yourself in the
workplace, sitting on a volunteer committee or teaching some-one a
new skill, these traits will help you effectively guide those who
would seek to follow.

These good leaders are...

L isteners. They take time to listen to the suggestions and concerns
of those they endeavor to lead.

E ncouragers. They don't try to do it all themselves. Neither do they
motivate by force or guilt. They encourage others and help bring out
their best.

A ssertive. They say what needs to be said without being unkind. They
tell the truth as they see it, openly and frankly.

D ecisive. They know what needs to be done and they make timely, even
difficult, decisions when necessary. But they can also take charge
without running over the people in their lives.

In short, good leaders L-E-A-D!

It's said that the trouble with being a leader today is that you
can't be sure whether people are following you or chasing you. But
those who will develop these four traits are sure to find that their
authority will be valued and respected.

-- Steve Goodier

P.S. CELEBRITY QUIP
A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal
skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study:
"Duh." -- Conan O'Brien

[Rhonda]

DREAM THAT WILL CATCH YOUR HEART

That all-too-quotable Yogi Berra once said, "If you don't know where
you are going, you might wind up someplace else." (I think that
happened to me once.)

But even if you know where you want to end up, do you REALLY WANT to
be there? I'm not talking about traveling now, but where we're going
with our lives. Is the dream you are following really that important
to you?

Most people are not lazy. They simply have uninspiring goals. They
don't accomplish what they set out to do because they lose interest.
The dream they are following is simply not that important to them.

But then I think of Dennis Oehler. He ran the 100-meter dash in 11.73
seconds. Record-holder Maurice Greene ran it in 9.79 seconds, almost
two seconds faster. So what's the big deal? Maurice Greene has two
legs. Dennis Oehler has one. One leg -- and a huge dream.

The truth is -- we are always highly motivated when something means a
great deal to us. If I fell into a deep lake and I didn't know how to
swim, I would become highly motivated in an instant. Climbing from the
lake would mean more to me than anything else in the world. My effort
would be no less than astounding and I would suddenly become one of
the most excited and enthusiastic persons imaginable.

And that goes for anything that is truly important to us. If we want
something badly enough, we will find necessary energy, excitement and
drive to grasp it.

Writer Tim Redmond says this about following worthwhile dreams: "There
are many things that will catch my eye, but there are only a few that
catch my heart...it is those I consider to pursue."

Is your dream big enough -- important enough -- to catch your heart?

-- Steve Goodier
__________

P.S. CELEBRITY QUIP
I stopped believing in Santa Claus at age six when my mother took me
to see him in a store and he asked for my autograph. -- Shirley
Temple Black

[Rhonda]

PASSIONATE LIVING

One man quipped: "It's not that I'm afraid of dying. It's just that
I've been alive for as long as I can remember, and I'm kind of set in
my ways."

Some people ARE afraid of dying. Others are not concerned about their
death ... but they worry about how they're going to get there. Will
illness linger? Or will it be sudden?

I can't even guess how or when I might die, but knowing my life will
end has actually helped me to live more passionately. I think others
have discovered the same phenomenon.

Journalists Bill and Judith Moyers documented death and dying in the
U.S. They discovered that many terminal patients they interviewed
actually began to live with joy and passion only after they learned
they were dying. Like one man said, "If you are told you will never
see spring again, and you live to see spring, spring takes on a whole
new life." ("Modern Maturity," Sept. /Oct. 2000)

Psychologist Abraham Maslow had a similar experience. After his first
heart attack he realized that his remaining days on earth were short.
He wrote about it to a friend: "My river never seemed so beautiful
(Maslow lived in Cambridge, Massachusetts, on the Charles River). The
confrontation with death -- and reprieve from it -- makes everything
look so precious, so sacred, so beautiful and I feel more strongly
than ever the impulse to love it, to embrace it, and to let myself be
overwhelmed by it...."

Can you imagine feeling that way? He ends with this remarkable
statement: "Death and its ever present possibility makes love,
passionate love, more possible. I wonder if we could love
passionately, if ecstasy would be possible at all, if we knew we'd
never die."

Why wait until we are told by a doctor that we may not have much time
to live. Aren't we all terminal? We became so at birth. And that is a
wonderful thing to know. For strange as it may seem, knowing life is
all too short can help us to live ... beautifully, meaningfully,
passionately.

It is a matter of embracing every day as if it were your last. Saying
what needs to be said today. Making plans to do today what you've been
putting off. And taking some time maybe just to do nothing but
appreciate life.

Like Emily says in Thornton Wilder's play "Our Town": "Do any human
beings ever realize life while they live it -- every, every minute?" I
hope that I can say, "Yes, at least a few times, I think I really
did."

-- Steve Goodier
__________

P.S. AIN'T IT SO
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the
computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per
gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. -- Robert
X.

[Rhonda]

WHAT DO YOU WANT MOST?

You've heard it said that the best things in life aren't things. This
truth is illustrated well by Andrea Jaeger.

At age 14 Andrea won her first professional tennis tournament. At 15,
she was the youngest player ever to be seeded at Wimbledon, a record
she held for 10 years. She won again and again until, at 18 years old,
she reached the finals of Wimbledon. But at age 19, a shoulder injury
brought her career to an end.

Her body was injured, but not her spirit. Andrea Jaeger no longer
serves up aces on the court, but she is serving society. She has
dedicated her time and money to bringing hope and joy to children who
are suffering from cancer or other life-threatening illnesses. She
runs her own organization full time, year-round, unpaid.

"You get very spoiled on the pro tour," she says. "The courtesy cars,
the five-star hotels, all the people clapping because you hit a good
shot. It's easy to forget what's important in life."

She forgets a lot less lately.

Her life is an example of what can happen when one concentrates on
"what's important in life." It has been said that the main cause for
failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you
want at the moment. And if the best things in life are not things,
then what do you want most? What Andrea wants most in life is to help
other people. And I'll wager she is fulfilled and happy because of her
dedication to a purpose bigger than herself.

What if you traded what you want at the moment for what you want
most -- if you remember what is important in life and try to do that?
The life you build would be no less than incredible.

-- Steve Goodier
__________

P.S. AIN'T IT SO
Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like
being taught. -- Sir Winston Churchill

[Rhonda]

A LOVE THAT CHANGES

Just as the delivery van pulled away from the florist, the manager
came running out. There was a cancellation on one of the orders, and
he needed it back.

"Which one?" asked the driver.

"The one that reads 'Darling, I will love you forever.' "

When we "fall in love," who doesn't feel that it will last forever?
But we change. And as we do, our love changes, too.

Do you remember the touching interchange between Tevye and Golde in
the musical "Fiddler on the Roof"?

"Do you love me?" Tevye asked his wife.

"Do I what?" Golde responded.

"Do you love me?"

"Do I love you? With our daughters getting married and this trouble in
the town, you are upset, you are worn out, go inside, go lie down,
maybe its indigestion."

"Golde, I'm asking you a question. Do you love me?"

"You're a fool."

"I know, but do you love me?"

"For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes, cooked your meals,
cleaned your house, given you children, milked the cow. After
twenty-five years, why speak of love right now? I'm your wife," she
said.

"But do you love me?"

Now Golde becomes reflective. "For twenty-five years I've lived with
him, fought with him, starved with him. Twenty-five years my bed is
his. If that's not love, what is?"

"Then you love me?"

"I suppose I do."

"It's nice to know."

And it IS nice to know, for twenty five years is a long time. Time
enough for things to change. Time enough to quit.

My wife and I were married when we were young. And I have to say, I
don't love her like I used to. I've changed, and so has she. Enough
years will do that. We've been through ups and downs. We grew older.
And my feelings for her grew older, too.

The relationship feels more secure now. I think it is a better love
than years ago - more enduring. More solid. Like the two of us, our
love grew up.

And maybe she could live the rest of her life without saying, "I love
you." I know how she feels. But she says it anyway.

And it's nice to know.

-- Steve Goodier

__________

P.S. FAVORITE QUOTE
All the beautiful sentiments in the world weigh less than a single
lovely action. -- James Russell Lowell

[Rhonda]

A Keeper

Their marriage was good, their dreams focused. Their best friends lived barely a wave away. I can see them now, Dad in trousers, work shirt and a hat; and Mom in a house dress, lawn mower in one hand, and dish-towel in the other? It was the time for fixing things: a curtain rod, the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door, the hem in a dress. Things we keep.


It was a way of life, and sometimes it made me crazy? All that re-fixing, re-heating leftovers, renewing; I wanted just once to be wasteful? Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away meant you knew there'd always be more.


But when my mother died, and I was standing in that clear morning light in the warmth of the hospital room, I was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't any more.

Sometimes, what we care about most gets all used up and goes away...never to return. So... While we have it, it's best we love it... And care for it... And fix it when it's broken... And heal it when it's sick.

This is true: For marriage... And old cars... And children with bad report cards... Dogs and cats with bad hips.. And aging parents... And grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it, because we are worth it. Some things we keep, like a best friend that moved away or a classmate we grew up with.

There are just some things that make life important,
Like people we know who are special... And so, we keep them close!



I received this from someone who thinks I am a 'keeper,' so I've sent it to the people I think of in the same way... Now it's your turn to send this to those people that are 'keepers' in your life?
Good friends are like stars...

You don't always see them, but you know they are always there!

[Rhonda]

MAXI






I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making
my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.






I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.


They, too, will get old.
I know I am sometimes forgetful.
But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.


Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers,
or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and
compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect



I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.
So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their
hair could turn silver




As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore.
I've even earned the right to be wrong

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever,
but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day(if I feel like it).

MAY OUR FRIENDSHIP NEVER COME APART ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART!

MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE A RAINBOW OF SMILES ON YOUR FACE AND IN YOUR HEART FOREVER AND EVER! FRIENDS FOREVER!





































































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