Post by diva on Jan 30, 2006 11:46:37 GMT -5
The following is a poem/song which I recently wrote about my eating disorder:
Diva
False Angel
By: Nikki Michaella Martello
January 23, 2006
I was broken, when I found you,
And you offered me your hand.
I took it gladly, for you said to me,
That you’d help me to stand.
And though I hardly knew you,
We soon became best friends,
So close to each other,
That we almost seemed like one.
We had our own little world
Apart from all the shame,
From all the Hell on Earth.
And I took you at your word.
You said you’d guide me,
I followed graciously,
To be above the rest,
I’d be the very best.
You said you’d show me
A brand new side of me.
A grander part of me,
For everyone to see.
And so I followed you,
Until I hardly knew,
Who I was now
From who I was before you.
Then you changed.
You started hurting me,
But still I stayed with you,
For you now were all I knew.
I thought you cared for me
But all you wanted to do,
Was to recreate me
To be the Devil’s child.
But you said “ I’m sorry “
That you would help me.
So I believed you again,
And still I followed you.
I now am broken still,
And at my all time low.
I try to leave you now,
But I feel I can’t escape your grasp.
You hold on tightly,
And you really fight me.
You say you’ll change me for the better.
I fear being with you now
And I fear for leaving you too.
Oh, God, what am I to do,
To escape the false angel.
I want to live my life
And be happy to be me.
But it’s so hard to leave you,
Even though there’s no living with you.
So I say good-bye to you.
And let go of you hand now.
It’s time to be my own self.
I’ll now take God’s hand in mine.
But you still want me,
To be your best friend.
But if I really want to be free,
I’ll need to concentrate on me.
So now I’m leaving you.
I’ve been hurt for far to long.
I need to let you go.
I need to let me be me.
You are not the angel
That I thought that you would be.
So just go away now,
And please let me be FREE!!!!
Diva
False Angel
By: Nikki Michaella Martello
January 23, 2006
I was broken, when I found you,
And you offered me your hand.
I took it gladly, for you said to me,
That you’d help me to stand.
And though I hardly knew you,
We soon became best friends,
So close to each other,
That we almost seemed like one.
We had our own little world
Apart from all the shame,
From all the Hell on Earth.
And I took you at your word.
You said you’d guide me,
I followed graciously,
To be above the rest,
I’d be the very best.
You said you’d show me
A brand new side of me.
A grander part of me,
For everyone to see.
And so I followed you,
Until I hardly knew,
Who I was now
From who I was before you.
Then you changed.
You started hurting me,
But still I stayed with you,
For you now were all I knew.
I thought you cared for me
But all you wanted to do,
Was to recreate me
To be the Devil’s child.
But you said “ I’m sorry “
That you would help me.
So I believed you again,
And still I followed you.
I now am broken still,
And at my all time low.
I try to leave you now,
But I feel I can’t escape your grasp.
You hold on tightly,
And you really fight me.
You say you’ll change me for the better.
I fear being with you now
And I fear for leaving you too.
Oh, God, what am I to do,
To escape the false angel.
I want to live my life
And be happy to be me.
But it’s so hard to leave you,
Even though there’s no living with you.
So I say good-bye to you.
And let go of you hand now.
It’s time to be my own self.
I’ll now take God’s hand in mine.
But you still want me,
To be your best friend.
But if I really want to be free,
I’ll need to concentrate on me.
So now I’m leaving you.
I’ve been hurt for far to long.
I need to let you go.
I need to let me be me.
You are not the angel
That I thought that you would be.
So just go away now,
And please let me be FREE!!!!